Starting from Scratch.. With Added Cake

I've lived in my new, first time buy house for just over 18 months now. When I moved from my old rented place, I whittled down all my belongings to what I felt were essentials...

- clothes I wear all the time...  not that random "but I could fit into it one day again.. if I lose 5 stone. And create a time machine. Entirely possible and therefore reasonable to hold onto this size 8 mini kilt I can't even slither up one overindulged-in-cake thigh.. and that I haven't ever actually worn.. whatever"
- furniture that will be sufficient for my needs
- books I can't part with for sentimental reasons (my entire and complete James Herbert collection. I'm still not over his death)
- toiletries.. obviously, but there will be another blog on that shortly
- stuff I have gathered from travelling the world, which look epic displayed on my new living room wall might I add
- anything covered in chocolate.. you know. Essentials. And another thing I need to blog about.
- cake.

In that 18 months.. ON MY OWN!! SINGLE handedly, I have managed to fill two double bedrooms, the attic, an under-stairs storage cupboard, a living room, a kitchen and a very full shed.

HOW?! Because I cling on to crap, forget I have bought said crap, and buy some more crap. It's almost purely B&M and Instragram's fault too. I think actually it's only reasonable for B&M to offer some form of counselling service post-till.


"Miss Rowlands, tell me about your reasons for visiting us today.. what were you here to buy?"
"Well I came to buy dog poo bags and some hayfever tablets"
"OK and what have you actually bought Miss Rowlands?"
"A chainsaw and an inflatable unicorn with matching slippers. And a bucket of mashmellows"
"And did you get the dog poo bags?"
"No."
"Let's go and have a sit down and talk through your issues...."

I feel now though, in the warmth of the summer sun, the need to relinquish things. I need to feel more peaceful and airy and fresh, and I am a huge believer in less is more despite the obvious evidence. So we are starting today. I say "we" because I'm going to need Dunelm to back to the fuck off. I need to do this for me!! NO STOP DRAGGING ME IN WITH YOUR CUSHION MAGNET!!

And back in the room.... specifically kitchen.

My kitchen cupboards are RAMMED with "well what if I need 250,000kg of plain flour and 17,000 tins of beans? Donald Trump is very unstable and I could make an amazing pie of some sort.. maybe.. should there be a nuclear bomb drop and we have to live inside for the next 30 years"..

Whilst the thought of that genuinely concerns me (the bomb not my extra plain bean pie.. although...) I DO NOT need this many things just moulding away in the cupboards. I bet I even have some form of new genetically adapted to eating pure plain flour larvae in there by now. But I'm not going to just throw good food out. Well, hopefully still good food.

STEP ONE then is to eat my kitchen clear. I will NOT be going shopping except for crucial ingredient to the cupboard cleansing masterpiece bits until everything in the cupboards, fridge and freezer has gone. I'll post a daily round up of what I've eaten to clear the debris on insta I think.

STEP TWO will be decided later.. but I'm thinking perhaps wardrobe (**ASOS screams audibly in the background**).


Wish me luck!